Ek Tarfa Pyaar - The story of unrequitted love

"Love".
The word we all know, we all relate to. and we all have felt in some or the other way.
Loving someone can put you in one of the most vulnerable positions. You open your heart to another person and your best wish is to get that love back.
But life isn't that simple, never is never will be.
As it's not a rom-com that will always have a happy ending.
I had to learn this hard truth, and chances are you have gone through the same at least once in your life.

Unrequited love is a sense of loss over something you never had. For whatever reason, I’ve found myself, more often than not, in situations when I’ve had feelings for someone who was either wasn’t ready for a relationship/was seeing someone else/just didn’t feel the same way/etc. You get the picture.
Now although I’m no expert of relationships and love, but I’ve been there. I’ve felt the heartbreak and have felt totally, painfully, alone. I have a wonderful support system of friends and family who have always helped me through everything in life, but heartbreak from “relationships that never were” is a something only us one-sided lovers can really truly understand.
  Recently only, i fell in love with someone who did not love me back, atleast not as much as i loved him. It felt bad and still does as i have to see that person everyday. I have friends around to keep me busy but yet all i end up thinking about is him. Sometimes i try to focus on the bad things but hah! Love conquers all.
The heartbreak was pretty difficult to deal with but i came out to be a stronger person, at the end isn't that what we want?
So, thought of writing about it and coming back to the thing that gives me peace.
Talking about my experience, I've found a few things that helped me overcome the pain that I'll share with you

One-sided love can leave you feeling pretty shitty. But you gotta be optimistic. Focus on the double sided lovers in your life. People who love you as much as you love them. It’s easy to let yourself feel alone when romantic love isn’t reciprocated, but friend-love and family-love are constant and powerful.

Depending on the situation, the person may know how you feel and has already told you they’re not into it.
But you may be in a situation where things are one-sided because of circumstance and you haven’t said anything. So tell the person how you feel. Although it can be painful, but once it’s done, it’s done, and you’ve got your answer.

 Just accepting that romantic love isn't usually a conscious decision can help a lot. So, if a person knows that you love them, but doesn't feel the same way about you, don't view it as some kind of betrayal or deliberate withholding. They might want to love you, but simply don't. Sometimes the feeling just isn't there.

So just move on!

Life is full of crazy experiences – some amazing, some terrible.  You go through a lot of pain too – especially in these years of our lives. But letting yourself feel is one of the greatest things you can do. Life can be a beautiful thing if you let it.
I’m still learning along with you all, no prophet here.
And as one of my friends reminded me, I remind you all - YOLO. 

Twiddledum and Twiddledeee!

Okay, so for this post i have got so many suggestions from my readers who are my friends but just because they have been so honest to me about my writing and so encouraging that i thought, let's write about these idiots only!
Friends, what are these, who are these people and how do they get to influence your decisions so much? Ever thought about all this? No, right? Its because nobody had to teach you the meaning of friends, be it your first time in school or first playground visit, you would always find a companion, a friend! Suppose its your first day in school, what would be one really excited about? Well, its not the teacher or the toys that interest you but the other kids of your age. You play with them, talk to them, tease them and that is what makes school fun!
Now, since you know what my post is about, you must be thinking what is "Twiddledum and Twiddledee", well, these guys are characters of a nursery rhyme , who would do mischief together, they were indistinguishable, isn't it just like friends we have in our lives, our partners in crime,  always doing something to get us in trouble, so similar yet so different from us!
So, these people who are like minded, who are in some way inspired by you and also inspire you are friends!
You must've heard that friends are family that you choose. Friends make you cry, make you laugh and do both at the same time too. Its like even if you have one good friend by your side, no matter how difficult time it is, you will be through it.
For me, i always bonded well with people who let me be silly around them, talk rubbish, crack lame jokes and laugh alone at them and are themselves really funny and silly! These are my kind-a people. I would wrestle with them, crack dirtiest jokes but they won't judge me. And frankly, i think i am really blessed to have a good share of such people in my life. These idiots, who apparently are my friends, my lifelines, mean a lot to me.
But its not like i've always been this lucky, i have had "the phase" you know! The phase where you have nobody, the phase where you feel really lonely. Times when you have no one to talk to. To really understand you must know that i was once a person who would share all the problems all the good news with almost everyone i felt a little connection with, i had a lot of friends, a lot of people i shared my secrets with but then time changes you, you mature with time and "the phase" did that to me. I had stopped sharing, i would sometimes not even know how to strike a conversation! It got to me really bad but you know how they say the only thing constant is change. Although in someway i enjoyed that phase too, had some alone time, started painting and stuff like that, at which i clearly sucked! But then had to do something, you know. Gladly, now i have such amazing people in my life that i am back to my old self! And my silly creative instincts are at peace and not asking me to paint again!
So, i matured, i learnt a few things, and this is one of the reasons that i cherish, love this bond so much! Friendship is too much to fit in words, it would never be enough. It is much more than many of us would understand. ❤

Coming to the fun part, well friendship not only makes you happy and giddy but teaches a lot of lessons too. They say there are no rules in friendship but there sure are some valuable lessons that i have learnt. But hey! I am no expert, i have just tried listing out some of my experiences with the moral of my stories. 

First, do not fall in love with your best friend!  - 
I shall start with my experience, i had this guy best friend and i had just came out of a very serious relationship, i was emotionally vulnerable. So this friend who was himself committed was always there for me, we would speak for hours on phone, always be together! It was all just really wonderful for me, the hard time didn't feel so bad with him being around! And then just somehow i don't even know how and when i fell in love! So typical, right? It happened, it so did. I kept it to myself but then when you have such feelings, it is there on your face. And soon, everybody knew! His girlfriend started having problems with me, things got bad! Our friendship got ruined. I got hurt, maybe his girlfriend too on some level. Today we hardly speak, and it is something i look back and laugh at but at that time, i remember the tear-y nights, hugging the pillow and trying to fall sleep! It was bad. So not only my personal experience but "kuch kuch hota hai" too tells us that when out of the two best friends one of them falls in love with the other one, not only that person gets hurt but also the friendship is ruined.
Having a relationship with your best friend is the best but make sure its not one sided!

Second, don't miss out on the fun - be it dancing in college fest or going on trips, getting drunk and doing stupid things, don't miss out on anything that can become some great memories. Silly fights, teasing each other, such small things can form such great bonds so easily , so imagine what trips and getting drunk would do. It always ends up with some great stories! So again, ill share my favourite story- my little gang and i went to this party and as expected everybody got really drunk there, so one of my friends who is a rare drinker took more than she should have and started saying things she shouldn't have, ended up puking on the food, the birthday cake, and soon everything was decorated with what was inside her few minutes ago!  She passed out which was better in someway but then we had to take her to her place which we didn't think was possible, so we tried dodging her parents call for a while, but you know indian parents, once they are onto something, they are faster than the FBI. So we had to give up, her parents threatened us to call the cops! Imagine our state, her parent's state, it was around  3 am in the morning, and we were at a petrol station waiting for them to come and get their daughter! It felt more like a movie kidnapping scene! Ultimately she got home safe, house arrested for more than few months. Haha. We felt so bad for her, but then things she did and said made our night. And even though we got in trouble, it was one of the best nights! Something to always remember. So yes, don't miss out on the fun, shit happens, you get over it but you end up with great stories. And isn't that something we all want!

Third, be there for each other - Well, this is something implied, friends help out each other, save each other's asses when in trouble, take the hit for them, if you aren't doing all this , its time to change! Become a little flexible, be there for your friend, good or bad, sane or crazy, right or wrong, just be supportive! After all a friend in need is a friend indeed. Its one of the important chapters of moral science books, remember?

Well, this is not a blog on how to make friends so i am done giving tips! 
I wrote this post as a tribute to friendship as you know the dedicated day to this bond has just gone!
Hope you liked what you read! 

P.S - Will try and be a little quick with the next one! Watch out the space for more

Life in a metro!

Hello my readers, assuming people do read my blog!
This is my third post and i can tell you writing something constantly and posting it, is not as easy as i thought it would be. Office, studies and all other stuff take up so much of your time that i hardly get any to write or for that matter do anything i love. Hence, the delay!

Now coming to my new topic, 'life in a metro' , since most of my readers are indian, the first thing thing that pops in your mind would be Shilpa Shetty and Konkona Sen- but no i am not talking about that bollywood movie , what i am talking about is "The Metro" , the thing that made our life so simple, so easy. Being from delhi, metro is a big part of my life, it has made commuting so comfortable. I remember the times when all we had was auto rickshaws and taxis, how difficult was it to commute! Going to relative's place, school or anywhere with friends - we needed a person who could drive us there. Talking about my experiences,  my school was around 20 km far from my place and the day i missed the school bus, my dad had to drop me and my brother all the way to the school ending up being late for office. Ahh! The lectures post that sure made me hate school. Thankfully in the last two years of my school life, metro came into existence and we (me and my brother) were able to spare those long lectures about early to bed and early to rise!
Metro has changed our lives so much that i thought it deserves a little of our attention, so here i am writing my post about it.
Commuting from a corner of the city to another at such cheap fare is possible because of metro, otherwise we had to bargain, argue with the auto and taxi drivers to take us to our destination at reasonable fare, that too without AC! Which again depended on their mood.
Metro on the other hand, comes in every 3-5 mins, fares are fixed for all, it saves us from the heat in summers and the chilly breeze in winter, it is so clean, so comfortable! Yes there are more than a few "Vilambs" in our yatra but then it is the best public transport available!
Do you remember the time when there was no women's compartment? The time when short girls had to stand next to a guy holding the rod above and stinking real bad! Haha i am sure, you do.
But now, all the pretty ladies out there are thankful for ladies coach, our very own clean and compartively spacious coach!
Travelling alone past 7-8 was a dream for most of the indian women, which again metro has made feasible! Also, travelling in metro is not just safe but entertaining too, small kids dancing around the pole, girls chit chatting about guys, women discussing their family issues, you get such amazing stories!
One of the best stories that i have is about a girl and well, you know how adjusting we indians are, even in metro, seats designed for 4 have to bear the weight of 5! We just fit in somehow. So once, this girl was trying to fit in on the seat of four where already four aunties were sitting- the so called hatti katti aunties i.e the healthy ones! She sat there, on the edge of course where she was struggling to even sit properly, but seriously i don't even understand the point of sitting like that, but anyway she sat down and a few minutes later came a jolt, and the next moment i see her, she has landed with her butt on the metro floor! It was so funny. The poor girl, stood up, quietly went towards the gate and got down at the next station. I can't even imagine her plight. Yes she did give us a great story but i am sure it must have been one of her most embarrassing moments.

Coming to the point of giving due credit to the metro, well i am not alone. Have you ever checked out the confessions page on Facebook?  It has some hilarious content! Be it about how a girl lures a guy and then steals his phone or how the whole common compartment crowd stands on the joint next to the women's or about the first sight crushes, it has it all. I have read a few funny stories there too, i sometimes actually end up laughing for hours and yes blabbering the story way too many times to almost everyone i know! I am such a talker but wait, who is judging? Well, lets not! 

Frankly, stories or no stories I am just so glad about the fact that Metro came into our lives, it made commuting so convenient, i personally hate travelling in buses so metro is like the best thing when you can't drive yourself somewhere!
If you are a fan of metro, i hope you like my post as much as you like the metro and if not i hope this post inspires you to travel more in metro, ditch the traffic and enjoy such beautiful little things in life.

Comment for suggestions!
Xoxo

Wicked Relationships!

If you are reading this, you ought to know that i am committed, its been more than three years and i love my man more than life. There is nothing that makes me happier than being with him.
Now as we know blogs are about writing what you feel, its like your diary except this one is public and well, its better to alter some details. But i have to be honest here, being in a relationship is tougher than you singles think it is. Yes, you have someone by your side all the time, someone you can talk to about anything and everything and at anytime. You can talk about what you had for dinner and even that feels worthwhile. It's all great!
But then again, (well, there is always a but) everything has its pros and cons, how about when you have a crush on someone and no, not your current lover, someone you met in the office, interacted a while ago, had a little eye contact and then you get damned as the guy turns out to be on the same floor as you- it gets complicated, so bloody complicated. You have such mixed feelings, comparing both of them, and then you reach to the point of thinking you might not have your first kiss ever again if you end up with your college sweetheart, the rush, the nervousness of a new relationship, these things that you miss out on. The love song you could relate to, doesn't sound so mystical then! Its like crossroads, wondering about 'The road not taken' .
Singles on the other hand can flirt with anyone they want, go wherever they want without talking to someone about it. They have the liberty to chill with anyone and everyone. Being close to a friend, having fun at a party would not end up in answering questions.
So which one is better, the singles chilling out, people having flings or the its been so long i want something new kinda relationships. Honestly? I don't know!
Talking about what i have and what i know is real relationships, sometimes you might wonder were you not truly in love that you found someone else attractive? Sometimes you want to let go of everything and start a fresh, the drama the fights even after all the efforts you put in your realationship, you want it all to go away. So let me tell you, when its been that long, they know you better than you know yourself. Talk about how you feel, how you used to enjoy the little benefits of being single, and that's it. Come to an understanding that flirting with other guys having little crushes is a sign of a healthy relationship. Trust is the foundation of this. Let this be in their knowledge and as long as they are cool with it, you've got yourself a golden deal. I consider myself lucky for having found a relationship like this, also he is my best friend so he has got to understand!
So even if it is tough, and i do miss my single life but there isn't a day when i regret being with him.
I'll just say be who you are and find someone that makes you happy or rather be someone that makes you happy. Suit yourself!
Enjoy being single? Stayy single!
Wanna get married? Go ahead!
Friends with benefits? Sure, why not!

Coming to the end of my post, i still don't know if relationships are wicked or virtuous, All i know is..
Relationship or no relationship,
Single or committed,
Nothing matters, just be happy, be you, do things you want to do! You only live once, remember? ;)

Leave your comments for suggestions or recommend my blog on Google if you like what your read! Also i have added the reaction feature, click on the one you had. 😉

Well, my first one!

So, here i am writing my very first blog! Writing makes me so nervous and so powerful at the same time, it gives the freedom of expressing ourselves freely but takes away our beliefs- should we be writing what people want to read or what needs to be written, a dilemma we all face.
It was really hard for me to think of a topic for my blog, working in the corporate sector doesn't really give me time to form views about anything other than the office gossips and seriously who would want to read that!
I remember the last time i wrote something out of love for writing was in school, writing poems for teenage crushes , the love of our lives or so we believed. Thinking of all these things i thought of the final rescuer - Google! Haha, how much do we rely on these things.. i miss the good old days when we used to think till the idea popped in our heads. Anyway, so yet again i found nothing out of the box there, so i thought why not write about something that is inside the box..and well, here i am writing about how i came up with the idea of my first post!
I guess people are right when they say " do something you love and you'll always find your way".


Hoping to write about more interesting life crisis in the future.
Xoxo